I was privileged enough to be sitting in a cafe near my home this morning drinking hot chocolate with a friend. The bill came in a tatty plastic folder. I did not consciously notice this, but my friend commented on the message that was being sent to us as customers in that important concluding moment of the relationship between us and the proprietors. I realised during the ensuing discussion how many of us are not consciously sensitive to the rituals between us. These rituals and the symbols we use in them result in the communication of the care or the lack of care we have towards others. I was reminded of how the unconscious or underlying positions we hold towards each other reveal themselves continuously, despite our best conscious efforts. And finally, I thought about how important it is to align the different parts of our psyche as much as we are able to, if we are to have relationships that support and enhance our mutual worth.